Small Update

Alright, just a quickie. I finally heard back from Mr. Stand-In Doctor, who gave me some bad news. I have to get records from my pediatrician, who I'm pretty sure is retired, to prove my vaccination record. SO that's going to be a blast. I'm not even sure who has to fill out that paperwork. I'm also fasting today so that I can go get my bloodwork (Cholestorol, etc) done this afternoon, which is required. I also have to see a specialist, which will be incredibly annoying, but is required, *sigh* All this in addition to the fact that I've not made an appointment to see an eye doctor yet as I'm waiting for my vision insurance to kick in, and my freebie Dentist is going to try to get me to pay $150 to "shave down" a chipped tooth. Which I don't care about so long as it's not a health risk, so I'll have to refuse that service from the man who was nice enough to give me a free exam and x-rays.

All other things aside, anxiety is a constant about it. I'm working through it. I have little cave-in moments where I feel like an awful, awful person for leaving for more than two years. I feel guilty for my kitties, my family, and for my friends cos I already know of one wedding that I'm missing! Ay. I have a nightmare at least twice a week that Peace Corps Departing is tomorrow - I have nothing packed, I don't know where to go, I haven't said goodbye to anybody. So I look forward to those increasing in frequency for the next 9+ months. In moments of weakness, what does an Atheistic Pessimist like me tell herself? It's a funny thing - I'm forced to rely on my own strength instead of delegating that out to "God" or "luck." It's all how I look at it, how I attack it, how I cope with it. So it's a soul-making venture, no? I'll keep telling myself that ;)